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Oh the remakes are abounding this season like sunflowers sprouting up in a late afternoon spring sunshine. How were so many of those sunflowers able to grow? Let’s just say manure makes a great fertilizer.
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Remember the 80s? Boy I sure do. It sends a chill up my spine and makes my whole body cringe like an dry ice cube running down the back of my shirt every time I think of them.
The new ice age epic, “10,000 B.C.,” is number one at the box office, even though it’s number two.
According to the AFP, director Roland Emmerich’s latest “mammoth” film, referring to its excruciating running time since none of his other films have featured a mammoth although its the only way it would have made “The Patriot” less historically accurate, scored $35.9 million in laundry money.
The film, of course, got speared by the critics. Jan Stewart of Newsday called it “An epic adventure of such towering testosterone counts and ceaseless tedium, you can almost feel the hair growing on your chest as the bags collect beneath your eyes.” Actually, watching chest hair grow would sound more interesting than this film. It’s probably the only time I wished Robin Williams would appear on screen.
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They say that the third time is the charm. Well, “they” is full of it because they never saw the first two “Alien vs. Predator” films.
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This week on DVD, it’s another video game movie that reminds you your time was better spent playing the video game because, by comparison, it kills less brain cells and doesn’t make you wish God had not given some of us eyes.
Every week before the opening films invade your local movie theater the way a tapeworm invades your stomach, we take a gander of your local listings to see which films are sure to suck. Hence the title, “Sure to Suck.” Pretty clever, ain’t it? I love alliteration. Read more »
Will Farrell’s comedy about an athlete of lesser intelligence (I’m referring to the one that came out last Friday) threw a brick from downtown.
According to E! Online, the movie finished first at the weekend box office, but didn’t do so hot.
The movie only picked up a measly $15 million on opening weekend, which in Hollywood is the amount of money executives spend on their morning coffee and soy based colon cleansing bran muffin.
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Wanna see something really scary? Then don’t watch the upcoming “Rosemary’s Baby” remake.
ShockTilYouDrop has learned that a remake of the classic Roman Polanski film is in the works.
Platinum Dunes is the production company behind the remake and they are hashing out the details with Paramount executives, details such as “Should we make fans of the original film want to claw their eyes out of their skull with their fingernails or use some type of sharpened instrument?”
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We would be remiss if we didn’t honor the memory and legend of former horror TV honey Vampira who passed away at the age of 86 by remembering one of the worst movies and one of her worst performances of all time.