The G.I. Joe Movie Will Suck, Now You Know and Knowing is Half the Battle
Is there a classic toy that doesn’t have a development deal with a major motion picture studio? First there was the Transformers movie and now G.I. Joe? What will the Slinky movie be like? “In a world, where you can walk down the stairs, alone or in pairs…”
Some new posters for the upcoming “G.I. Joe” movie hit the web this week. Movies Online scored the first images of them.
First, here’s a look at the poster of the infamous Baroness whose sultry curves, shimmering hair and absolutely gorgeous face doesn’t make her look the least bit German.
Then there’s the evil Snake Eyes who looks like someone took a dump on Master Chief from “Halo”…
Finally, there’s a poster for Duke who looks like he could really mess us up if we made any jokes about him, so just look at the picture and shut up because I like having my nose in the middle of my face…
Joe Said,
February 2, 2009 @ 12:27 pm
Ummm… the movie may turn out to be a total flop but… Snake eyes is not evil and the photos make him look like… um, well, he looks like Snake eyes- who was out long before even the system that HALO is on came out. The movie may turn out to suck- but so does your reporting. This nerdy comment was brought to you by your friends at your local Ford, Lincoln, and Mercury dealer. Shop with us and you won’t be disappointed….
Dustin Said,
March 3, 2009 @ 2:12 pm
You’ve determined that a movie is going to suck by looking at three posters? lol, this has to be the dumbest shit I’ve ever heard. I’m looking forward to the movie coming out. Will it be good or suck, it’s to early to tell since the only trailer out is very brief. By the way, your comment about Duke shows that you were just reaching to try to say something funny, it really shows.
ressentiment Said,
March 12, 2009 @ 4:36 am
If there’s anyone (indeed, anything) that sucks, it would be you and what you painstakingly peddle as your “review,” particularly of a movie that has yet to be screened and based solely on your “conclusions” about movie posters. I completely agree with the comments above thus far and I’m personally looking forward to watching the movie. You, on the other hand, could just do what you seem to be predisposed to do anyway: stay home and jerk off in front of your computer. That’s what you seem to have done before posting your stupid “review.”
Random Lee Forest Said,
April 12, 2009 @ 12:50 pm
File this one under “Dumb Bloggers”.
Jerry McKRaken Said,
May 7, 2009 @ 3:13 pm
You are correct sir. This movie is going to blow. Blow hard, and blow strong. The suck will be unbearable.
Hollywood needs to stop taking shits on our childhood. Can’t we have one thing, just ONE fucking thing that Hollywood won’t totally ruin?
EL Said,
June 21, 2009 @ 12:05 am
“Can’t we have one thing, just ONE fucking thing that Hollywood won’t totally ruin?”
Nope! They take pleasure in doing this.
Pat Said,
November 9, 2009 @ 9:29 pm
This movie was awsome i watched at home it when it came out It was a good shooter and scifi movie so just watched and not judge posters.