Do you want to know the truth? Do you want to answer the questions no one in power bothers to ask? Do you want to believe? Well here it is, these movies are going to suck.

Here are the films and DVDs that are guaranteed to suck when they open this Friday both at a theater near you and on your home DVD player, according to the Internet Movie Database and Rotten Tomatoes.

First there’s the “The X-Files” follow up called “I Want to Believe,” which is the title the fans gave to it. The full title is “I Want to Believe that This is Going to Be a Quality Movie.”

Not much is known about the plot. It’s been kept under very close wraps since the film started shooting, just to build the tension and keep the conspiracies flying before the movie could have a chance to premiere. Frankly, I don’t care what the story is. I’d just be happy if someone could figure how this series has so many damn fans. Watching David Duchovny as Mulder is like watching a statue slowly come to life.

The film includes the entire principal cast from the television show as well as a few new faces including actor/comedian Billy Connolly, actress Amanda Peet and rapper Xhibit. Why doesn’t this movie include a rap song about the movie, the way “Men in Black” did? Not that the song would be any good. I just wanted to see Gillian Anderson dressed the way I picture her in my head, as an Xhibit backup dancer.

Then on DVD comes the sequel to the crappy 80s classic “The Lost Boys” called “The Lost Boys: The Tribe” starring Corey Feldman and Corey Haim in the movie that made them stars for approximately 14 and a half minutes.

The movie focuses on a brother and sister who move into the town with their aunt after their parents are killed in a plane wreck. The sister falls in love with a local hunk who turns out to be a vampire and once again, it’s up to the Frogs to do a little exterminating. It’ll make you want to drive a stake through your own heart in which case if you like it, then you obviously don’t have one, so you’re screwed.